Whose missing in the pew at homecoming?

Taking time to reflect at another crossroads for Christendom in its death throes. A crossroads during c-tine, as in Alberta at least, we are deciding to follow the ill-fated Denmark plan (we actually have quite the history of continuing to blindly follow that which does not aid citizens–look at your utility bills following deregulation; seniors Blue Cross are but two conversations we can have), but I do not want to digress. It comes as a belonging challenge for church.

I realize, that there are many that have allowed fear-hate to make them lightining rods for the White Nationalist Supremacy Church that is currently flexing its minority pick-up truck pectorals in our nation. Those are not the ones I am reflecting on. There are those that are choosing to remain online, which I do applaud as it shows care for congregation–mostly using Zoom or Google Meets, the challenge in that being a bit of privilige for devices, computer literarcy, but the biggest in accessibility being large enough screens for families to share together (it is an economic accessibility). Though I do cheer the universal design worship has discovered within the use of technology during c-tine and connection.

Though it does create a challenge in care, as now churches can move away from distancing measures, and in a few weeks masking. There is a population being left out in the celebratory home coming. As you re-gather in sanctuaries across Alberta in this homecoming take a time to look around.

Who is not there?

Which pews/chairs are empty?

This is the risk of authentic belonging. What happens in our cycle when the space the person was in is empty? As now, at the sacred community level, one needs to process interdependently why they are not there?

1. Are they immuno-compromised (or another vulerable population) and it is still currently not safe? What does this mean for connection as many have moved away from online after service gatherings to connect for their mental health?

2. Has their transportation been impacted? Those that drive, or public transit (yes in Calgary various routes are on rotating cancellation).

3. Are they in hospital? ICU?

4. Have they died during c-tine and has it gone unnoticed? Death due to covid. Death due to being unable to access medical services due to pandemic, or sadly, during the current white supremacist flex, succumbed to an opioid poisoning or other drug misuse poisoning, or taken their own life.

It is not simply, tape off, pews open, welcome home.

There is a need to acknowledge those who cannot come home, and be with members for any amount of reasons, and an authentic answer to the old evangelical trope is needed at this time in history:

What Would Jesus Do?

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May we discover Joy in the Pause (R.I.P. Archbishop Desmond Tutu)

Have you ever heard to spiritual elders laugh and now what joy sounds likes? When I would listen to interviews of watch the videos of Archbishop Desmond Tutu & the Dalai Lama, this sound would ring with joy. Two men, trying to speak hope in the world, in very Franciscan ways of living before speaking. In my early days returning to the church, Tutu’s works, began to shape my emergent theolgoy (Along with Talbot, JP II & Spong). Working in a book store, I came across and devoured his two books emerging out of the TRC at the end of Apartheid in South Africa, God has a Dream (2003) and No Future without Forgiveness (2000). He spoke of hope, he spoke truth, and showed that the Christian sacremant of reconciliation was not something of words spoken between cleric and parishner in a tea room or a closet, but rather something that light shines into the truth to confuse the darkness and become action steps for transfiguration of society in hope.

His other books on forgiveness, hope, inclusion, belonging, children stories, powerful prayer, rebuilding, enewal ( a fuller listing of his works on Good Reads). I mean, think of being called to the highest office within your church, at a time you could not actually go to the Cathedral, because the nation, where your church exists, does not see you as a full person with full rights? Apartheid South Africa. His wonderful children’s story analogies around noses I would use in my multi-cultural ministry settings to break the unspoken prejudices that existed within generations, but also to teach about God’s belonging and beautiful Imageo Dei.

https://www.bing.com/videos/search?view=detail&mid=079B670EE9EE2CB59A57079B670EE9EE2CB59A57&q=desmond tutu&shtp=GetUrl&shid=f290cb35-7c55-4884-9ba9-44ada3f6c102&shtk=TWFuc2JyaWRnZSBPbmUgb24gT25lOiBEZXNtb25kIFR1dHU%3D&shdk=RGVzbW9uZCBUdXR1IG9mIFNvdXRoIEFmcmljYSB0YWxrcyB0byBQZXRlciBNYW5zYnJpZGdlIGFib3V0IHRoZSBzdGF0ZSBvZiBjdXJyZW50IHdvcmxkIGFmZmFpcnMsIGFuZCBob3cgU291dGggQWZyaWNhIGhhcyBjaGFuZ2VkIHNpbmNlIGFwYXJ0aGVpZCBlbmRlZC4%3D&shhk=vUCsTLKvZVscG4%2F65LBh%2FaF04bfhxdf6XOv5zZZMAmc%3D&form=VDSHOT&shth=OVP.9BHSw3jsogzW0jmu8GIc7QDcB8

I encourage you to click on the CBC link above for an interview Peter Mansbridge had with Tutu.

As well, to remember one of his most powerful works, 2011’s God is Not a Christian and other provocations, take time during this holiday season to pick up that and his collaboration with the Dalai Lama in 2016 Book of Joy to spend time in contemplation. The great pause, that covid has caused the world, means we have an opportunity to live out joy in our lives and communities, to be povocateurs of transfiguration, with that little twinkle of Desmond in our own heart’s eye.

As we celebrate a life of Joy, the question that rests in our souls today, is:

Who is continuing the work?

Who is called to the work?

Are you being called to the work of Joy?

https://hollywoodlife.com/2021/12/26/desmond-tutu-death-celebrities-react/

Day 312- What can be emergent out of c-tine

Day 312, the sun has set, we have stabilized in hospitalizations and cases in Alberta to where we were hovering in early December when more restrictions set upon us, but in 312 days 1,512 Albertans have lost their lives to Covid, with roughly the same lost to opioid overdoses in our province in the year, the ripples of grief throughout. It is time a part, time separated, time where we are left to ponder why?

The Desert Fathers and Mothers were those that chose to set themselves a part from the world to draw closer into the love and wisdom of the Holy Mystery. And as this time draws on, I wonder what we are to learn about ourselves and how our world can be and should be…for truly we are seeing how broken the system is and in need of rebirth.

Whether you understand it as prayer, meditation, contemplation, mindfulness, or silence it is the moments when the still quiet voice is heard. What is heard? What are you feeling?

Where does H-O-P-E emerge?

Where do you find hope? How can we renew hope and re-learn hope in our world?

It is not just being drawn back to the ancient wisdom of the monks of the wilderness today, but starting to reflect on the hope the world was trying to create at the turn of the millennium in 2000 (or 2001 for the type A’s). I remember it was a season of being in lay ministry in the Catholic church, reading and watching the Pope I served under, Pope John Paul II, and the concept of Jubilee. More ancient wisdom that can heal our world and let us emerge from being distanced into something better than the “before times”.

But it takes faith. It takes belief in, and action to the concept that human life has intrinsic value. More value than money. It is re-understanding that money is a tool, not an all consuming hoarde.

What is jubilee? Simple, it is ancient wisdom from the Hebrew Bible (Leviticus 25:1-13), a year of rest, a year of communing with creation. It is a year of graceful forgiveness and new beginnings. Imagine a world where we focused on citizens and creation. We have already seen glimmers of the healing that can happen in the environment by our world forced to go slow. We have seen that the world can continue when we as people are forced off the hamster wheel. Yes I hear the cries for money and economy, but what if all debt was forgiven? And we simply got a chance to start from 0.

Are you starting to feel hope?

What needs to change, when we emerge from our own desert time, for hope to exist and abound a new for you? For you family? Your neighbour? Our world?

Hope- a week late

Ah, don’t know if it was just trying to get into the contemplative groove of the season, or the festivities, or simply having missed getting the decorations up by the first week of Advent hearing the Anglican guilt tsk tsk of Nana (Anglican guilt, is like Catholic guilt, but comes with a British accent), but it has taken some time to come to the keyboard. Also rolling memories growing up with cousins, setting up Grandma Ragan’s Christmas tree together and seeing how much tinsel it could hold (she loved her tinsel); as my Nan aged helping her set up her decorations after church, and the fun of decorating at home with my family growing up, how my Mum loved this time of year.

It could also just possibly be a wee bit of being c-weary (Covid weary), which part of that is the social/physical distancing measures that regardless of what the government says we know as a household we will be continuing throughout this time of year, but more driven by the seething anger towards the self-entitled that continue to minimize life lost at this time, and publicly tantrum for being asked to think outside themselves. So as our house has completed the decorating with festive music in the background, I sit to write some reflections on the week that was– H-O-P-E.

These are the heart thoughts that roil the gunk of the soul at this time as I attempt to bring together thoughts on Hope. I pause to share some practices that may be of benefit where ever you are:

1. A simple breathing exercise from CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) to centre yourself, and calm your being. It is a count up and count down exercise. Deep diaphragm breathing, where on the inhale you count (1 to 10) then on the exhale use a word that centres (I like the words Peace), and then at 10 you repeat counting back down to 1 (I like the word peace). Over the last few weeks of teaching, I have extended it to a rotation of 3: Faith/Joy; Peace/Hope and then Love/Love. Note the Advent themes, and the gifts of the Spirit? Takes about 5 minutes to go through.
2. There is the idea of reading the Gospel of Luke, a chapter a night starting Dec. 1, so on Christmas eve you have read the whole Jesus story. It is a good practice, we are doing this with our family. If you are starting late simply adjust so it fits the days left. We also take time to open with a Christmas Carol, then share the chapter, and thoughts/;learnings around it and the time period, and close with prayers. If you are a single, perhaps try doing over a video call or speaker phone with a friend or two.

But it still begs the question what is hope? Or on one dark Christmas Eve night, a client struggling with suicidal ideation overnight would ask me:

“where do you get hope?”

It is a deep and pertinent question for each of us, especially at this time.

It is fortuitous that on the last day of the week of hope, a Golden Girls stumbled across my Prime Video. I am a fan, but I also enjoy many of the sitcoms of the era, why? Simple, they would tackle tough subjects with humour, poise and create thought/discussion. See, it was a simple principle, donating things to the local parish thrift shop awaiting pick up. One of the ladies has picked up some scratch tickets for a bit of fun, 1 for each…and it is discovered that they win $10,000. The dreaming begins, for safety it is placed in a new-worn looking leather coat. The doorbell rings, and Sophia shows the box, and then adds the coat (S.4, ep. 8 Brother Can you Spare a Jacket). They just miss picking the coat back up from the thrift shop, and it winds up auctioned off after being worn at a celebrity at a concert, and then given to a nameless client at the shelter. Some music to listen to here.

Why does this matter? Simple, the ladies wind up at the parish shelter to look for the coat and spend the night. In the course of the evening, waiting for lights out so they can search for the coat and reclaim their winnings, to fuel their dreams, they meet some of those in the shelter. A PhD graduate, who can no longer handle life, and coped in the bottle, a hard working man from the service industry in Minnesota, even with the money made due to the colour of his skin could not get traction in life, and then Sophia’s friends from Shady Pines, who clearly states the greatest travesty of Western Society “It costs money to get old” she had lost her place at the care home, and now simply existed in shelter.

What do you think they did in the morning when the Padre woke the room up, having found the ticket?

What would you do?

Hope, can be, and is, choosing those moments to see beyond labels to who a person is. That is, a person. Full stop, full intrinsic value, because they are who they are. That is the courageous safe space we need to create in the world, a space where everyone is supported to become who they are meant to authentically be.

Where does hope come from?

Simply put for me, in the simple moments of kindness to ourselves and others.

How do you get H-O-P-E?

Day 47

Your Saturday morning song here.

I do realize that day 47 is mine, some have been in c-tine longer, others shorter, but it is my benchmark I travel through in this life within, through and infused with the Holy Mystery. This may or may not take a true canticle form, or a mix of a variety of forms as I wrestle through thoughts of what is happening in our leadership realm of my nation and province…and oh boy..what a trip. (support a local Calgary comic shop with curb side pick up or online orders- Words & Pictures)

It emerged on the Covid-19 update on Day 45

When our Premier decided to act like 45

and announce a “soft” re-open

on May the First

or the next morning

for people needed provincial parks,

hair dressers, GOLF, and bookstores

declaring mental health and economy

Yet, not realizing economies change, evolve and adapt

this could be a time to plan, dream, and prepare

Yet the old, and the very old is what is yearned for

on Day 46’s drive

a wildfire was seen

increased litter in

high way ditches,

cars crammed together

as people congregate together

hiking in with fire wood,

and campers

flounting adapted rules

can we not be trusted?

Less understanding than the animals?

Caught through a window, at a pull off, even the deer understand remain 6 feet away, though my son with seeing challenges loved the awesomeness of this site.

Yet, hope shines through,

as our governing party,

Fulfilled a platform promise

As another dark time clouds over Nova Scotia in mourning

Her Majesty’s Loyal Opposition

shows their red, white, and blue

As an order in Cabinet shows

as our PM said,

“Canadians are worth more than thoughts and prayers”

(PSA: we do not have a right to bear arms of any kind, historically weapons were not allowed in Canada at all, if you have confusion on what our Constitution Act 1982 and Charter of Rights and Freedoms )

Why the continued call to re-open? Personal freedoms over collective health?

Simply put– the last gasps of Christendom, supported by those who are unaware

wrapped in a faux cross heresies of dominionism and tribulationists

convoluting in support of their true altar

the almighty

DOLLAR.

Are we ready for a rapid quiet revolution?

To shred the ground and let it fall away?

For are we not worth more?

Than these yahoos desire?

As the old spiritual goes, be like the deer.

We are in this together

Be kind to one another

But remember

No profit

is worth more

than the life of our neighbour

or our self.

 

Hi-Jacked Faith

Hope wins

Is the shattering truth of the empty tomb

and the new life,

celebrated a scant few days ago

the blood over doors

the exodus of the persecuted

a false regime propped up on religious eyes

shattered.

Religious oppressors

Empire dehumanizing

2,000 years ago give or take a few years

depending on your historical lens

Constantine’s swords sleighed

bastardizing Brother Jesus’ words of the Kingdom being near

not sword and steel to rule all,

but a transfiguration of the world

true belonging due to simply being created

in the wonderful mosaic image of the Holy

Sacredness breathed in

acknowledged,

blessed

Love wins

We continue to miss the mark

our corporal sin,

bastardizing love with qualifiers

to sink into our own badge of “sinful” forgiveness honours

to create dissent,

exclusion

contrary to the words, and life lived, lost, and resurrected

Still today

horrors cloaked in a faux cross

to pacify the masses, like an opioid

so they will believe they do note

deserve equality, equity, justice

health care, belonging

affirmation of inherent worth

for being human.

We allow too many,

as the quiet revolution speaks from the whispers to the shouts

the empire of the faux cross rattles as the embers burn away the  crucifixion wood

dominion to destruction of creation

like our neighbour

that we were blessed to inherit, to curate, cultivate, care for

to serve and live in cocreation with the Holy.

Willing to succumb to the absolute evil

that the sacred writings of those on the journey spoke of

greed in the lust after money

the lust after the matarial

the lust of defining our worth based on bank accounts, belongings owned, that has always led astray.

Mixing up material belongings and money, with values and belonging.

For the kingdom as Brother Jesus said, is near…

we can touch the thin space.

We simply need to throw off the yoke and shackles of the Empire

The faux cross we clamour to,

and stand in the margins,

with the labourer who taught us through living

that

Hope Wins

Love Wins

Are you willing?

 

 

We are Risen, We will Rise

From DC Comics Facebook Page Captain Carrot

Ah the joy of Easter, my children even in their tweens and teens waking up to see what the Easter Bunny has left. Many decry us for “commercializing” Easter, but really it is the joy of the new, the love of discovery and mystery, and as my Mum always said, as long as you believe they will come (whether it was Santa or the Easter Bunny), and much like the early church, our family functioned and had its soul because of our Matriarchs.

We are entering into the unknown, we are living the unknown, as I have been sharing during this Holy Week. Our current times of social distancing, the anxieties, and fears some or all of us may be feeling at different moments is exactly how the friends of Brother Jesus were feeling up until the morning. The morning the women would go to show their love for their friend, son, (possibly) husband, and teacher. The one who showed them the way of radical love in shattering the principalities, the oppressors, those that put land and money ahead of people. They believed, they lived, the finally belonged affirmed in being a full person.

Saturday evening, when the Sabbath ended, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome went out and purchased burial spices so they could anoint Jesus’ body. 2 Very early on Sunday morning,[a] just at sunrise, they went to the tomb. 3 On the way they were asking each other, “Who will roll away the stone for us from the entrance to the tomb?” 4 But as they arrived, they looked up and saw that the stone, which was very large, had already been rolled aside.

-Gospel of Mark 16:1-4 (New Living Translation)

Then they were crushed by defeat. Are you hearing or seeing parallels in your own journey of life? Belonging? Love wins? Shattering glass ceilings? Affirming human rights? Decolonizing your country, and your own soul? Renewing, rebuilding, reconnecting, resurrecting a new and healthy self and community?

For all this was rolled into the women heading to the tomb. They were honouring the loss, grieving. Thinking that they had been defeated, was it all for nought? The same question can echo through our whole being during times of dissonance, times of disconnect, times when we feel defeated, those 1 step forward 2 steps back time…yet…

When they entered the tomb, they saw a young man clothed in a white robe sitting on the right side. The women were shocked, 6 but the angel said, “Don’t be alarmed. You are looking for Jesus of Nazareth,[b] who was crucified. He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead! Look, this is where they laid his body. 7 Now go and tell his disciples, including Peter, that Jesus is going ahead of you to Galilee. You will see him there, just as he told you before he died.”
8 The women fled from the tomb, trembling and bewildered, and they said nothing to anyone because they were too frightened

-Gospel of Mark 16:5-8 (New Living Translation)

The Universe, the Infinite Holy Mystery that all is in, and is in all, shook the status quo even furtherr than Brother Jesus. For they said… NO! To his death. NO! to the oppressors winning! NO! to the normalcy that society allows and builds rationales around for why all are not equal, all are not taken care of, all are not valued.

Easter Sunday, the Empty Tomb is the beloved Creator shaking the world and whole universe, all of creation with their:

NO!

And fear is a response in the grief cycle. It shook the women to realize that they had prepared themselves to mourn, to honour, and what were they handed?

LOVE WINS!

We are walking towards the empty tomb during this pandemic, we are expecting and desiring a return to the old status quo when we emerge. Just leave this time in the tomb. Same as the Empire and their apologists desired when they killed Jesus of Nazareth. And the resounding answer that this story would end, was simply, No.

Then they briefly reported all this to Peter and his companions. Afterward Jesus himself sent them out from east to west with the sacred and unfailing message of salvation that gives eternal life. Amen 

-Gospel of Mark 16:8 (New Living Translation, shorter ending)

They moved through the fear stage, and continue co-creating a new way of life. One that included everyone, brought everyone along, where resources were shared equitably, and when a need was heard of, it was filled. Where purpose and belonging were not tied to monetary means or whether or not one was a “citizen” of the Empire. More so, it was tied to one’s own inherent worth, gifts and talents being shared.

You belong because you are.

Let that settle in, as this morning Pope Francis used Easter Sunday to launch a new resurrection in the world, a clarion call that echoes these sentiments– #popeforubi. UBI is Universal Basic Income, yes my Trekkie brethren, we are one step closer to the Utopia of Star Trek.

To recap, for the simplicity of message as we find in the writings of John-Mark (in the Gospel of Mark), whose family owned the Upper Room, discipled by Peter and Paul, who recorded the stories of Peter for his gospel as tradition told us, written for an Empire audience of the Romans, yet simply what are we seeking today? My reflection Facebook after Resurrection Sunday service online:

Almost 2,000 years ago (just shy 12 yrs give or take) the empty tomb gave the friends a choice to radically continue the journey of love to transform their world. To throw of the chains of Empire, persecution, colonization, dehumanization cloaked and hidden in the name of God…the message was clear, whether they believed with word, seeing, or touching, Brother Jesus was alive, and the command of the whole heart was clear, love as he loved (and loves) us.
Will you be a part of the resurrection, co-creating the world today, and forward from this time in the tomb to the new resurrection day? Will you live out love? Allow for authentic belonging because we all have value for simply being?
Will you step out of fear into hope? And love as if each moment of each day is Easter Sunday?

 

 

 

In belonging what is healed? Part One

It is interesting in the world of business and non-profits (religious included) we float the idea of “Core Values”, yet how often do they just end up as brochure buried on a shelf or bulletin board? How often have we heard, we value all being welcome with dignity– yet accessibility projects are deferred for things such as security systems (or whom holds the power decrees is more important)?

It can be challenging during this time of year not to fall victim to the chimera created by the religious right of the war on Christmas…I have yet to meet anyone who vehemently hates Santa, or the idea of generosity. What is challenging is the man-made hate monger created image of Jesus is challenged–for these are not the core values he professed. It was never about exclusion, in fact most of the challenging teachings were directed at the religious of Jesus’ day for missing the mark– the mark? We can quote Matthew 25 around care for the poor, sick, elderly, widows, the ones society felt were toss away, but we are in the Holy Season of Advent for Christians, and it distills the core values fairly clearly:

Hope*Faith*Joy*Peace*Love

These are the core that come from the common truth, that goes back to the Creation story, and that the Prophet Isaiah reminds us of:

A phrase many religious gathering in the faiths of Abraham use. This idea of inclusive, but flexed for exclusion for not fully unpacking the full story:

 “And as for the outsiders who now follow me,

working for me, loving my name,

and wanting to be my servants—

All who keep Sabbath and don’t defile it,

holding fast to my covenant—

I’ll bring them to my holy mountain

and give them joy in my house of prayer.

They’ll be welcome to worship the same as the ‘insiders,’

to bring burnt offerings and sacrifices to my altar.

Oh yes, my house of worship

will be known as a house of prayer for all people. (The Message, Isaiah 56:6-7)

It is laying out clearly, that all are welcome, not only welcome, but are a divine image (Imageo Dei) and authentically belong as one of God’s children blessedly created.

One cannot claim a divine-holy presence, if their presence is not open to all of the divine image, and love of God-Self-Neighbour (the Covenant– the Law & The Prophets summarized and lived out).

What is lost in belonging? What is lost is the bondage of fear, prejudice, bigotry, conflict, hate, constant grieving and greed.

What is gained?

Hope, Peace, Faith, Joy and Love.

Further resources on Inclusion/Belonging:

There was a powerful video shared about this congregation at Shelly Christensen’s speaking at the International Day of Persons with Disabilities at the JCC Calgary today, unfortunately I was unable to track down the specific link, here are some others though to provoke conversation and thought.

Bet Shalom Congregation: https://disabilitiesinclusion.org/exemplar-congregations/bet-shalom-congregation/

Apirl 2, 2009 Inclusion Video: https://youtu.be/D72NKCZlNNA

Inclusion Innovations: http://inclusioninnovations.com

 

Soul Ripples 2 (FREE E-Book)

It is a story told over two volumes:

A stone skipping across a pond leaves ripples with each impact.

The joys and life of traumas are the like the skipping stone through the generations.

Soul Ripples

What happens when the helper needs help?

For over 20 years Ty Ragan served his neighbour from the rough camps to the shelters to home and every where’s in-between. The simple life lesson of Jesus of Nazareth to love your neighbour as yourself was the centre question to be answered in his life. In May 2016 his life would begin to change drastically through unknown seizures and strokes.

Enter into the ripples that brought him to 2016, the transformational power of love of family and friends as he seeks new ripples in hope for his soul.

Buy Soul Ripples here.

Then enter the healing with Soul Ripples Two by clicking link in the caption of the picture:

Soul Ripples 2

Enjoy the journey, and please share with those you think need to see that healing is possible…and Hope abounds.

A Four Letter Word

There are many four letter words that have come out of my mouth during this journey, and have been applied to my life and the ripple effects with my family. My journey on healing from trauma was supported awesomely though by having family it allowed me the space to heal. Not only heal, but make the connections within my flashbacks to trace core memories of trauma that needed to be rooted out, and healed to create the ripple within my own person.

It did feel like energy and electricity bursting through my body and leaving during the sessions. It was amazing as the weeks between would pass and different emotions of the spectrum would be felt- both positive and negative.

Yet, the work I did between sessions I would not encourage someone without a healthy in home support network to do…for in the isolation it could very easily go from healing to suicidal, it was a trip into the darkness and trusting the light path to bring you out.

Yes I am a person of faith, and that faith whether out there or subtle have played a role in my life. The same with this journey, and I am glad that in my life prayer and action go hand in hand, and the constant dialogue within myself and the Holy Mystery is there. It was amazing as I began healing to see the different opportunities that opened up for me and my family, the different places where we could connect for joy, love and healing. Where our faith would be rewarded, and where we could see communities around us come out of their own struggles into a new dynamic understanding of belonging as happened with our home church in Calgary in regards to the faith challenged laid down by my son to them.

This is the winding road. The ripples like upon a river or lake created by a skipping stone. The soul ripples that answered the question, what happens when the helper needs help?

They discover who their true family is (whether blood or chosen, there are many who journeyed with us, and blessed us communally and individually that I may or may not have mentioned in these two volumes, to you all I say thank you). You also discover your own true self anew.

It was this sense that brought me to the remission appointment at the Foothills Hospital with my PhD. Psychologist where the healing began on February 14, 2019. Here I was entering the office once more on October 31, 2019…

Not knowing what may or may not come of the meeting, but one thing was certain.

Today was the day; I could firmly stand in my faith, in my healing.

It was the day where the four letter word that had carried my family through the darkness was fully lived and embraced. It was a beautiful four letters:

H-O-P-E-

My step into hope of the new dawn of my pilgrimage with Brother Jesus as I once more stepped into the office.