Barrier Breaker? Blessed Release?

It is an intriguing time of the journey. Navigating change. Navigating a reignition/recycle of severe health symptomology, and then feeling the drain away. High stress, the gig economy of academia, into release and relax. Exploring the holistic for far to much, especially in the West, we silo each aspect of our whole self (this is physical or psychological or emotional or spiritual) and miss that all pieces are integrated, and impact one another.

Yet as the rain comes down, in a dry and drought ridden prairie, one ponders, if the dirt being washed away, and the probability and possibility of new life it brings.

Takes me into the learning opportunities I have experienced over the last several weeks, from an educational Passover Meal, that engaged with the stories of the Hebrew Bible, and the concept of Amalekites. Those that had to be removed, for Israel in the story to flourish in the Promised Land (yes I am probably overly simplifying), a story that has been used as a weaponization of sacred literature in the current acts of Genocide by the Israeli government labelling the Palestinians as Amalekites. Though Hamas, inserting their own drive from the land call to action as well. Missing the colonial/settler dynamic of a world trying to cope with their own anti-semitic guilt out of the Holocaust that created and continued to perpetuate what is now a horror show, and needs not only a cease fire, but a true solution for truth, reconciliation and peace.

Then intersecting with a blessed graduation weekend this past weekend, where the exploration of the speakers on the parable from the Christian Testament, of the builder who builds on rocks, and bringing the story into context, context, context, of the Sermon on the Mount, and what it means to shape and re-shape our life and journey. To be open to moments of cyncism, to know there may be times we are going through the motions or show, but what happens when we authentically engage?

To the workshop on neurodiversity students before the graduation weekend at another school, that stirred emotions and remembrances of my own lore if you will. I have always exhibited traits, and before my micro-strokes, and ongoing ones, have a brain that works and processes differently. Some of this caused by anti-convulsant medication, some by just biological/neurology. I chose to excel at academics, and my creative pursuits– why? Simple, enter into my geeky fandoms, and be the brain, so when bullied it was for that, and not the wonderful world of 80’s and 90’s kids who decided to use the “r word”, but shifting gears, there was moments and probably not as bad, as I was also a well developed smart alyc 🙂

But still the remembrance opening.

And brings me back around to Passover, which produced the reflection of Caregiver Fallacy

A piece of what this part of the dinner reflections after the sharing of the story of the Amalekites, and then as was shared to me, from the teachings of Conservative Rabbi Moses Brandises of Minz, from the Hasidic notion of Amalekite as metaphor/allegory for things such as gluttony, laziness, discouragement and how this functions in our own lives…which leads to this idea of a simple poetic form:

What discourages?

When one’s mind fog rolls on

and simple to complex words and ideas easily shared

is it not easier to simply be quiet?

Can their be healing?

Not always the medical cure

but rather the communal justice

that shatters barriers

sees costs lower

and roll

equity, equality, diversity, acceptance

release

as physical environment shifts and change

as relationships grow

others end

cessation can cause healthy release

the physiological system still reflects the emtoinal and neurological health

weariness

constantly seen and felt

yet, begins to ease

though constantly dopey or simply tired

can their ever be enough rest?

Can relationships renew?

Grow anew…

As the spring rain, replaces the April Snow– sleet

like a perennial

not annual

will hope sprout from the soul?

To be able to feel once more

Alleluia?

MOTU Trek Continues

There is a multi-verse, some say possibly an omniverse. Where there are heroes and mutants. Wizards and Warriors. Ghouls and Ghosts. Scientists and beings that are godlike.

Magic is real.

Science explains the how.

And a new portal has burst open.

Ram Man prepares to help his friend He-Man, can Clamp Champ stop the new intruder…

Is this sword wielding battle axe throwing Barbarian friend or foe

But who is this new wizard having come through the realms of beyond the veil of this life, casting a spell to save a Ferengi?

Will Trapjaw fall? Or will Evil Lynn save her ally?

And what role does Quark play in setting things on track once more?

To Be Continued

Master-Versal Trek Part 3

Getting ready to beam up from an away mission during the Dominion War with his bride, Jadzia and Dr. Bashir, Worf finds himself separated and in a different reality. Time travel he growls as he notes who he knew as Ambassador Spock though younger, trapped by a lobster-man, in a Clawful, a Jem Hadar aiming at– is that Sisko trapped by a snake?

He stops the Jem Hadar and then drops Clawful…

Who is this Skeletor? And why does the staff he wields appear to be a key to any of this?

What is Spock thinking of the Klingon with a what looks like a Federation uniform?

From below a gurgle and cackle…what lies beneath…

Need we say…

To Be Continued

Critical Media

Could be the week I am in teaching my philosophy courses. Could be the provincail government coming for the literal personhood of our kids. Could be the concept of “social capital” being used as a Trojan Horse for eugenics or it could be just wanting to engage with folks that are actually thinking. The simple piece that has been lost with our consumption of media, and the fact that we tend to default to what technology says, and whose voice becomes loudest and miss out on some fundamentals.

The era when we used to be able to pick up the two daily papers available, and get differing worldviews (bias) but the facts of the newstory would overlap are long gone. Similiairly the concept of the most important information being in the first paragraph or trusting the front page to be a breaking and important story.

One of the major shifts in the 21st century, is news media becoming part of corporations where the goal is to make as much profit as possible for share holders, to sell clicks and ad revenues. This also adds an extra layer for what stories will be run by editors, reporters and columnists based on what will impact profits (not a search for fact and the truth).

The conflation of columonists/editorializing as news. Commentary is designed to engage emotion (appeal to emotion is the fallacy), and as you may note on panels they may fall the representativeness test of diversity, and this can be ideologically as well where they will find slightly varying viewpoints within their own bias camp so that confirmation bias and avoiding contrary evidence happens in the concept known as fooling ourselves.

Through the corporate buy out, newsrooms have closed, and consolidated– so how many writers does each section have? This impacts ability to investigate. True investigative journalism is slow, it takes time to research, and get sources to go on the record, and verify (used to be 2 verifiable sources before a story could run and this is why many stories although true died on the line to print or run on television). We already know that the writer or personality can shape the presentation highlighting what they think is important, leaving out pieces that do not fuel their understanding of the world, demonizing who they will. Just look at the coverage of Canadian politics at any level, once a media source has deemed who they want to win, and see how they cover them favourably, find the opponents that make their choice look the best, and the images used for the other candidates– this is most notable with the underlying and implicit misogyny within for female leaders and candidates.

It is also through this consoloditation and being corporate subsidiaries that drove the Federal government to provide money for smaller newsrooms to stay open and independent when closures were and are happening. Which produced excellent reporting, Medicine Hat is a shining example of this.

Other things that impact news ability:

1. Are follow up questions allowed at press conferences? (in Alberta no).
2. Is it a curated invite only event? Are media allowed to stay and scrum after?
3. What is the credentials of the reporter and the reputation of the publication? (sorry folks rebel, fox, true north don’t meet the validity test but definately can be entertaining).
4. Who does breaking the story benefit? Much like with experts, is there an underlying benefit for the media, the writer/editor or advertisers/corporations?

This doesn’t even speak into the democratization of news via social media, vanity media, having commentary content from influencers, the 24-7-365 news cycle that perpetuates editorializing and talking heads over actual facts and discovery. The need that everything needs an image or a video (sorry humanity, we are not designed to endure that level of constant vicarious/secondary trauma compoundment). Think, the rise of Alt-right (what we used to call neo-nazis or white supremacy) youtube has a favourable content algorhtym for, rise of anti-semitism (not Anti-Government of Israel genocide practice, actual hatred of Jews) tied to Tik Tok algorhthyms. The ability that we misconstrue influencers and spokespeople and celebrities as experts in a field or research. Where our understanding of events is shaped by technology (yes even if you use the home page news streams cultivated by bing or google) it is shaped by our online life, and other likes/shares/reads by those around us or we interact with. I mean, think about it Meta and Google would rather pay millions to the Canadian government than allow our news sources on their platforms.

As I look back at historic news stories, i do wonder if they would have happened in the current infotainment environment. Would we have known about the Rwandan Genocide? The Bosnia ethinc cleansing? The Holocaust? The atrocioous and unethical psychological practices of the past for experiments? The Pedophile Priests (which broke years earlier in Canada)? Residential Schools? The Fall of the Berlin Wall?

What events stand out to you? Imagine if the story died because it would cost profits to shareholders?

And then ask yourself, was Orwell giving a warning in 1984 or a road map? What about the Handmaid’s Tale of Atwood? Or even the Purge Movies?

Do you know if you’re viewing/reading actual news? Or just another ad revenue?

-30-below

-30- is old newspaper vernacular for the end of the story so the typesetters new how much space to leave. In regards to expertise I would like to share a few points:

1. Where did they receive their training/education? If there isn’t a school that trains/equips, who were their mentors that shaped them? What is the reputation of those in the process?
2. Are they known for making ethical-moral-responsive decisions?
3. What reputation do they have among their peers? Professionals?
4. What awards or other accolades do they have? And yes, longevity in the field does count.

Some credible international media BBC and Al-Jazeera when used together.

In Canada, yes CTV/Global but use CBC in conjunction. Why does CBC matter? Over at least my lifetime, and archives before show that government scandals, and other nefarious things happening are more likely first reported on the CBC.

Master-Versal Trek 2

As He-Man holds aloft his magic sword

Calling down the power of Grayskull

the Transformation begins…

but wait

Was it Skeletor’s chaos Magic,

or Orko’s attempt to save Spock?

Battle Cat and Cringer separate?

And new to the race to beat evil…

To Be Continued

Master-versal Trek

What new scheme has Q hatched to judge bi-peds and the humans and allies of the United Federation of Planets? Still trapped on Eternia in a struggle between good and evil, our landing parties out of time and place, find themselves trapped in a dimensional rift that brings both Snake Mountain of Eternia, and The Fright Zone of Hordak of Etheria to sharing the same temporal space…

Wait…Q hiding in the shadows, a version of Skeletor trapping Stratos as Buzz Off prepares to sore… Why is Saru in the throne of villainy? As new heroes and villains , will their roles be flipped– blur in and out of existence…

A battle commenced at dusk and through the night can we see what awaits as Skeletor and his TrapJaw mechazoid trap Spock and Quark, which He-Man is the one that can bring evil low? And which are simply bizzaro Fakers or not yet of the time?

Which Hordak is the true Hordak that has opened the rift to reclaim his place of villainy?

As the light breaks who controls the thrones?

Are they simply puppets this Merman controlled Fright Zone with Kobra Kahn trapping heroes with the snake and Webstor serving a clone? A temporal fugitive? Or the true form of Eternia’s Evil dethroned? As the Tyrannarosaurus Rex with weapons of mass destruction prepares to stop Chakotay from bringing light back to the dungeon and sewers…

Who will the Salt Vampire feast on as Ram Man prepares to break Hordak’s Hold…

As the snake traps Sisko, Ram Ma’am and a He-Man, another lofts his magic sword but will the power find him in time?

“Bwahahahaha” Q bellows from the shadows of the throne room as Hordak prepares to fire on He-Man and Jitsu who want to release the throne from being occupied…

Kane and Warrior move forward through the rift from the Fright Zone as Whiplash prepares to dispell the next shift…

Who is that other Hordak lurking in Fright to spread fear?

Which of the Three Skeletors holds the Chaos Magic of Snake Mountain?

And will Stratos fly?

Can Orko’s Magic stop chaos and free Spock and Quark or will he trap himself?

Oh and will Beast Man defeat Chakotay with his new pet and its rockets?

To Be Continued

Out of Order

“I’m okay because you took the time to fix us. We’re Timelords, we’re doing rehab out of order”

-The Doctor (15) to The Doctor (14) in the Giggle post bigeneration

How do we become complete? How do we find contentment, not simply complaceny. Do we often conflate a job (to pay the bills) or a career (that which gives us notice) with our calling/vocation (that which is our purpose we are created to do?). Theologian, and former Bishop of Newark, John Shelby Spong would take these ideas so eloquently written of by the Dalai Lama XIV (in The Art of Happiness at Work) to three phases of life looking to the first third or so being preparation for true vocation, then living the vocation, and then moving into the senior years, the reinvention of purpose (to paraphrase). It is the third movement we sometimes forget, and the second subsumed within survival (that during this era of greedflation can be easily seen).

Contemplating doing things out of order, and how we view purpose can definately come out of order. As we rewrite our story, to enter into complacent, yet not thrive for what we are designed for.

It is reflective at this time, for anyone who has ever gone through a disability season, short term you can return to your work you were doing.

But do we allow for a time to grieve the time lost?

What happens in the long-term disability claim which is up to 2 years after the 3 months of short term. It can have two endings, back to where you were, or something new.

Going back though the employer does not have to guarantee you your former role, so you enter into a new one in the same organization.

But do we allow time to grieve loss of the old role, and entry into the new?

Then there may be no ability to return to work, and where you were existing already between 55-60% of your monthly income, moving onto government disability entitlements which change your life, yet…

Do we allow space for grief of the loss?

Do we allow an honouring of purpose not tied to income?

The other journey, is in the midst of the ending of long-term disability, and not being able to return to that which you had known. A purpose that had shaped your identity even if you did not fully realize how much vocation does in our world. But the economic realities of life take precedent over the grieving process. As the LTD monies conclude, and not EI exists, how do you cover the costs of living? Finding new work? Leaping into the fray once more.

In some stories, leaping into the new vocation, then scant weeks of starting, a new shock–a global pandemic and pivot back to work from home.

Yet in the process of living into the new normal, back on the hamster wheel. Back into ensuring one can live no one realizes that it does happen backwards as 15 opened us up with, maybe not rehab but grieving for the moments in time out of order, for slipping in, no matter how the new role vocationally fits.

It does leave the journey in, how easily rewritten, was it true? Possibly and definately.

But…

What a world where there could be a few extra months,

to allow the grieving of what was

before entering into the what is.

How different would our world be?

MAiD & Me

I wish the cheeky title was a simple play on the title of an `80’s sci-fi movie. But it speaks to the reality of Canada in 2023, and what was to be a saving grace for human dignity at the end of life, and could very well (if not already) been weaponized as a renewed form of eugenics that we may not have seen for at least a generation (though lets be honest with genetic testing) but let’s not digress to far down the rabbit trail off track.

I have always been a supporter of what was once termed Euthanasia, I recall the discussion around the supper table with the news on, as Sue Rodriguez battled for dignity at her end of life, and being able to choose. I remember the debate within family circles around the Latimer case, a severly disabled girl’s life ended by her Dad, who did not want to see her living in severe pain anymore (but how do we know when one does not communicate in traditional methodologies?).

I have walked with relatives and clients, before the lighting rod of politicization hit the topic, and they would be given control over their own pain medication (passive shall we say, medical assistance in dying). I watched barbarity with loved ones when it was highly politicized and we had become polarized to where the necessities of life were ceased (yes you read that right) but no comfort.

I was heartened to hear of legalization.

I knew that the law did not answer the Supreme Court’s ruling.

It was missing key pieces around personal directives, and mental health. Our Justice Minister had failed and it was challenged and sent back (via Quebec if I remember correctly).

I walked with those able to choose. Wrestle theologically. Philosophically. Hold space.

Be.

Hear the questions asked.

Be with their loved ones. Be with them.

As they pass into, the next grand adventure, as my kids call it, the Great Tea Party.

As I would discuss with my students, normative ethics, that which is aspirational for what ought to be, would never see this abused, would always be patient (person) centered with their wish, their autonomy.

In the realm of applied ethics of behaviours is where hiccups and harm or even abuse comes.

For simply put, it speaks into the family, the worn out, those fighting, or those that are so tired or conformed they default to what the experts say, lose the voice of the one, for the many or the budget line, or as we saw rise to the top during covid–

What is a life?

What is a life of value?

Is it one with only economic value (for aren’t we all debits on the government balance sheet?)?

Or is there more to validity of life

of one’s purpose

For the spiritual, being crafted lovingly in the image of the Holy

bearers of star dust for the cosmological

Even for the scientific minded, not merely accidents

but a beautiful genetic dance of wrapping and extrapolating helixes.

Yet here we are.

At what was seen as a slippery slope, in the fight for dignity.

A slippery slope argument, though phrased badly, fallacious even

May be invalid,

Does not mean it may not contain truth

It is what is needed in challenging those laying it out the leap from A to Z with no B thru Y in between, is having them connect the dots to verify an authentic slippery slope.

At this point in our history, where the one’s mostly opting in our province is due to loneliness (disconnect, lack of belonging, lack of purpose if you will) and/or poverty, is not why it exists.

Will we push back.

I sit here as I type as a Dad of a medically complex child becoming an adult, where once we heard whispers of MAiD, now we brace for the onslaught that may yet to come in adult services.

I type, as someone last in the doctor with my own chronic conditions,

may have been a teaching moment

may have been a reality

told for myself

with new additions

was a realistic treatment option.

I type

I ponder

and wonder

if we have the desire to change the application to the aspiration

…

End of a Flippin’ Era

Yes some tongue in cheek, as people ever wondered if I would give up the last bastion of 3G flippery (c’mon Trekkie’s it was like having a communicator from TOS). But I digress, yes I used to be one of keeping up with the latest phone, even had a blackberry until y’know, Telus’ customer service did that in when it died, and I wound up going to Rogers and starting the run of the “burner phone”, always stating I would upgrade to a smart phone, but things would happen.

Unexpected bills.

Health crisis where I could not use touch screens.

Loss of savings to keep a household going during health crisis.

About to get a Smart Phone when my career pivoted and relaunched, only to, y’know have a pandemic hit.

And then, well why bother, emerging out of, thinking of, but other costs and matters took precedent.

Really, it was kinda nice to have a phone that could only call and text.

Not available to socials or emails 24-7, I could choose when I wanted to engage.

A simplicity era.

Simpler times, as one friend noted, a reminder of when people actually had to call you to reach you (or market to you).

But today at 4 p.m.

The era came to an end.

Flippin’ no more.

The final bastions of my time in the homeless sector.

The final physical reminder of my unchosen tranistion time.

A simcard that now reads

No longer registered.

Funny,

how we mark change, not as makign life simpler, but in tranistioning away from simplicity.

A new era,

as one era flippin’ ends,

with one final flip

to close.

Camelot Musings

It is always intriguing when I walk groups through the Self-Care Coaching Wheel as inevitably I know there is a portion that will trip people up and cause unnecessary consternation despite our enlightened times. It is the concept of spirituality. It can be a stumbling block to be ignored, due to the fact we jump to definitional conclusions. Either fully structured religion, which most carry the stereotypes (quite a few well earned) from the extremist or fundamentalist sects or, the flip, where the idea of spirituality moves into the more extreme new agey style concepts. Neither are beneficial, though both may be a part of someone’s spiritual life as with everything in between both extremes. What this area speaks to is the intrinsic things one does, that renews them. An example I use to open up the creative exploration of the intrinsic renewal is the idea of story, and usually share the latest fiction I am reading–this time around my Whovian was showing:

The Tenth Doctor and Donna travel through the story of Camelot…

And boy was this a great time of renewal, a fun adventure, Donna Noble was one of the companions that does not get the kudos deserved for the fun she brought to the adventures, but this book felt like seeing an episode, but I digress for it opened up the story of Arthur and his Knights once more to me. An amusing aside, through genealogy in the Welsh side of my family lineage goes back to Moroccan royalty, a one Uther PenDragon, which if you had an awesome Dad like I did growing up who would tape late night movies he thought his kids would like, would have known Uther as Arthur’s Dad, thanks to the amazing sword and sorcery fun of Excalibur:

Epic Climatic Battle of Arthur and Mordred

But there is more links to this story and life impact. See in elementary school I had a speech therapist (which was fun, also uniquely, was my Nan & Granddad’s neighbour’s daughter), and as such I didn’t always like to read aloud in class, I usually would take the same books out of the school library, as then if I had to, I knew them well (at home I’d read anything, my folks always made sure we got to the library and used bookstores). One school library trip I found a rather large book, King Arthur and His Knights, and was refused from signing it out because it was beyond me, I was 7 or 8 at the time.

I was not happy, and shared with my Mum and Dad at supper, and after dinner, my Dad took me to the mall and the bookstore there, probably a WHSmithbooks in that time (this was back in the era dear readers when all malls had bookstores, that had diversity of books available). There he found and bought a rather thick hardcover book for me to take to school for reading and for the next book report:

So yes, having folks who believe in you, and encourage you to challenge and grow is a good thing in life. Taking a risk, and not accepting the limits others place upon you.

The story of magic and adventure resonated. Things that have growtn out of there in my own life-

The first Vacation Bible School (VBS) I was part of planning and facilitating we had group time in the sanctuary, where I moved out all the chairs and with masking tape created a roundtable on the floor, as the equality that all belonged, all opinions and ideas mattered–all God’s kids belonged together. This gathering space became important for volunteers and families to share in, as my first VBS was during the time of the Pinelake Tornado in Alberta.

Magic happens, and is real (like I tell my kids, and my Mum told us growing up, if you do not believe, Santa and the Easter Bunny don’t visit 🙂 because why can’t we allow for magic and fun in life).

Purpose matters. The various stories of the knights told of purpose, many times not tied to money, but rather who and what was meant to happen. This has been an important growth within my practice, that purpose and job are not mutually exclusive.

The Holy Grail, what a fun winding story. For those who enjoy deutero-canonical-apocryphal-Gnostic Christian writings, know that the Grail (and a nod to Dan Brown for riveting mystery in Da Vinci Code, and Garth Ennis for the satire horror in The Preacher) speaks possibly to the blood line of Jesus, son of Mary, of Nazareth. The growth of the idea being Jesus and Mary Magdalene married and had a family (Kazanzakis’ The Last Temptation of Christ explored alterantive ideas of what if Jesus did not go to the Cross, but I digress–as you can see being encouraged to be curious, to read, and explore does a mind good from a young age). Some have said the concept of Jesus being married is heresy, though one has to ask, for someone completely humna, and completely divine does it change your faith if he was also a Dad?

There is also ideas around immortality being tied to a physical cup that Jesus used to serve the institution of the Eucharist/Communion. This concept, that grew into the history of the Grail Knights was explored in the film, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (almost 40 year old spoiler ahead):

The concept of the hero’s quest, many concepts immortalized for newer generations in the Star Wars universe. A constant reminder, that in our own personal stories, we are the hero on the journey, just an in other’s stories we are there supporting casts.

But purpose, belonging are themes that grow forward from Arthurian legends for me, with the intersection of how these stories came into my own life. The lived pieces and what it means to be a parent, a Dad.

Take time to pause each day, and feed the intrinsic pieces of you, renew, and reconnect with who you are.